TODAY could have been a disaster.
It certainly started out that way before getting better, then worse, before taking a turn towards the phenomenally great.
First of all, we had no sleep. Paris has been so hot (even by our standards) and with THAT view of the Tour Eiffel out our windows, we had to keep them flung open.
That meant the sounds of the street were unavoidable: Montmartre revellers until all hours, bar and cafe staff closing up, shopkeepers getting an early start, motorbikes revving up the cobblestone streets, loud conversations rising to our fourth-floor bedroom.
Add to this the fact that if we were ever going to get lost, you can guarantee it was going to be in Paris. And true to form, the "straight" path downhill from Montmartre to the Louvre took us in a zig-zag that meant the long way down - even with a GPS!
Did I mention this is Tuesday? Well, the Louvre is closed on Mardi (Tuesday) ... something I must have failed to see in the fine print of our Paris Pass when I decided to do everything on our second day and relax around Montmartre on our arrival instead.
Plan B led us to the top of the Arc De Triomphe and to a lovely Fromage Gourmand plate with cappuccinos to do some people-watching and to bask in the view of the massive monument.
But while dining, it started to rain. Then storm.
Of course we had taken the raincoats out of our day packs because it had been such a lovely hot day when we set out (doh!).
We checked the radar on the iPhone and, in a break in the rain, headed towards the Eiffel Tower.
That's when the rain really came down, and we found ourselves stranded with no awnings or shops to take shelter in and only a small overhang in a backstreet business.
We decided to brave the drops and managed to get just across the road from the tower when we spotted a man selling umbrellas. We didn't have anything smaller than a 50 euro note and he didn't have any change. Next second, he was off ... with our 50 ... running across the road.
But he was definitely more honest than he looked. He was only trying to find a mate to see if he had any change and was soon back beside us (and the look on our faces must have been a mix of dumb Aussie, gratefulness and relief).
The rest of the afternoon was a heady mix of 281m summit views complete with French champagne, water views from a cruise on the Seine, more open-top double-decker bus exhilaration with a hop on-hop off Le Cars Rouge tour through city streets at peak hour, and a much more direct walk back to Montmartre for drinks and a late dinner.
Over our three days, we certainly managed to see Paris and Parisiens from all perspectives: up high, on the water, in the Metro, begging on streets and under ATMs, coming out of Dior and Cartier, working in shops, cars, cafes and businesses.
We found little sign of the arrogance the rest of the world seems to complain about with regard to the French. We found that a bonjour/bonsoir, merci/merci beaucoup, s'il vous plait, excusez-moi and c'est magnifique go a long way.
Finally! A use for five years of high school French.
Smart car/broooom-broooom that goes beep beep count: 256
Couples kissing in public in the city of love: 5 (surprisingly)
Number of times I have nearly been killed walking across zebra crossings or taking photos: countless.
Lesson of the day: First look to the left, not the right when crossing a street in France to avoid being the next road-statistic pedestrian.
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